Lost in translation

I was at a Craft Fair last weekend. The dreary day and my burgeoning bump contributed to my endless trips to the loo. There were only five cubicles and as usual with female (council) toilets, two didn't work, so there was a long queue that tailed towards the burger stand and the french patessiere (or however you spell it).

Anyway, I was third in the queue, following a rather cute elderly lady who was also behind a young(ish) french lady who was shouting at her mobile. Now bear in mind that we were inside the toilet and her voice echoed rather embarassingly. Como fkdhlshdhskjd sldjf va? fledodj;lksd va? dhfshdfh va? The elderly lady turned to me with a knowing smile, like she knew what I was thinking. French. I don't understand what the hell she's talking about. That sort of line of thought. Then something flashed in my head. A-ha! So I fished my phone from my coat pocket and pretended to dial. With exaggerated flair, I started speaking, perhaps as loud as the french lady who just finished talking and was patiently waiting for her turn to go inside a vacant cubicle.

Nay, grabe, jari ako sa kasilyas, nag linya, amo lagi, kadugay, inday jaoy nalibang sa suyod!

I can still remember the expression of the elderly lady. I thought she was thinking, what the f*, here's another one. bloody immigrants!