Wednesday, 10 September 2008

God help me

I'm trying to work on my computer. I needed to come up with a 2,500-word essay about what some bloke from Cambridge University said. If I don't do this well, all the work I did for the past 9 months would just go down the drain. Now, I'm not a writer, as you can see. It would take me 6 mornings to come up with a passable 2,000-word write-up on some legalese topics. I could patch up a couple of paragraphs for my blog in less than 10 minutes but that's because I am not paid to do so and I don't have a wide audience to appeal to - so no pressure there. Most importantly, my commenters are all nice people who tolerate my tendency to blabber incoherently - so that's the plus-side of it.

So I tried some techniques to get me back into focus. I made some popcorn. I ate it while it's hot, and then my mum-in-law decided to ring me at this most unsuitable time. I said, herro? and she said, what's the matter with you? I said, nohing! I'm eahing pohcohn! She said, you shouldn't stuff yourself with that! It's rubbish! Aren't you working? I said, I'm trying! Then she said, you're going to be FAT! I said, thank you!

Now, that didn't help at all, did it? So I went back to my computer. I have planned my structure about 7 hours ago and until now, that's the only thing on the page. My husband called and asked how everything is going. I said, it's going swimmingly. He asked me to remember my deadline all the time. This is no time to procrastinate, he said. I asked him how to spell procrastinate and he said, never mind that!

So I went back into eating the now cool (ish) popcorn. Still, nothing comes to mind. I see the words. STATIC. REGULATORS. JUDGES. EVIDENCE. But I couldn't connect them all. I couldn't make sense of these bloody words.

I got a call. How's the essay doing? I said, I'm writing. He said, good!

I didn't say I'm writing this post!


Bella said...

Great ending... love that you employed the word swimmingly!

lynneth said...

good luck! seems like a heck of a job!

betchai said...

:) i could not help but smile with how you ended your post. that's true, it is so hard to put all things together into writing especially if we are not in the mood, and especially if it is 2,500 words! i hope you well though, hope you get to finish your 2,500 word essay.

HiPnCooLMoMMa said...

i bet you have finished it by now...and who says you are not a writer...goolay I love how you put everything in here...may halong inggit pa nga wishing that i could write as good as you noh. wala ka lang sa mood, period, o nga how do you spell pro po pro, ah nevah mind ^_^

Joy said...

So what's the essay for? You should have rung me to help you finish it :D

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caryn said...

hahahah! go soy! i takes me ages to write a paper too. the past two weeks i've been inventing fairy tale abstracts for journals and i dread the moment when i have to write the actual papers. heehee. good luck!

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